by Justin Mckibben | Jun 11, 2018 | Anthony Bourdain, Celebrity, Death, Depression, Dual Diagnosis, Heroin, Mental Health, Mood Disorders, News, Suicide
Anthony Michael Bourdain, born June 25, 1956, was a man with a rich and vibrant legacy. He took us on exotic adventures to explore the world and tried to expand the view of the audience on culinary arts and culture. He was much more to so many than a celebrity chef.
Anthony Bourdain was an author, travel documentarian, and television personality. He used programs like A Cooks Tour and No Reservations to travel across the globe, focusing on the international culture, cuisine, and the human condition. He has sat down for humble lunches with President Obama, and his explosive personality has even been featured in cartoons like The Simpsons and popular FX series Archer. Bourdain has taken us to some of the most secluded corners of faraway places to chat with the locals and enjoy a simple dessert. Anthony Bourdain was widely regarded as one of the most influential chefs in the world.
On June 8th, 2018 the world was shocked to hear that Anthony Bourdain had died at 61 years old. Even more heartbreaking was to learn his death was a suicide. Over the last several days, his passing has sparked a continuous stream of dialog about mental health and the need for treatment resources. Over the years the famous traveling chef fought against drugs like heroin, as well as depression. As we remember who Anthony Bourdain was, and as we call for letting go of stigma and pushing forward with helping those in need, it is important to look at the whole story.
Kitchen Confidential
Anthony Bourdain first fought his way up the kitchen ladder in New York to become a long-time chef at Brasserie Les Hallas. Around this time, he wrote his breakthrough memoirs titled Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly, which took him beyond the cutting boards to carving his way through the literary map.
Part of this first memoir describes the long journey that brought him to become a chef, and a notable element of his story is extreme excursions into drugs, strung out over years. In the book Kitchen Confidential he wrote about his experiences back in 1981 working at a restaurant:
“We were high all the time, sneaking off to the walk-in refrigerator at every opportunity to ‘conceptualize.’ Hardly a decision was made without drugs. Cannabis, methaqualone, cocaine, LSD, psilocybin mushrooms soaked in honey and used to sweeten tea, secobarbital, tuinal, amphetamine, codeine and, increasingly, heroin, which we’d send a Spanish-speaking busboy over to Alphabet City to get.”
Later, Bourdain became more open about discussing his drug use. He’d even said some of these problems should have killed him in his 20s. In 2014, he did an episode of his show Parts Unknown that highlighted the ongoing opioid epidemic in Massachusetts. During the episode he says,
“Somebody who wakes up in the morning and their first order of business is (to) get heroin — I know what that’s like,”
Parts Unknown went on to be honored with five Emmy awards.
Eventually, Anthony Bourdain found himself kicking heroin in the 80s in drug rehab. When talking about finally getting clean he said,
“And we’re the lucky ones. We made it out alive. There are a lot of guys that didn’t get that far. But you know, I also don’t have that many regrets either.”
However, he admits to still worked long hours in New York kitchens interspersed with binges that consisted of cocaine and alcohol. Following rehab that Bourdain had cleaned up his act, although he continued drinking alcohol. He later wrote,
“Most people who kick heroin and cocaine have to give up on everything. Maybe because my experiences were so awful in the end, I’ve never been tempted to relapse,”
On June 8, 2018, Bourdain was found dead of an apparent suicide by hanging in his room at the Le Chambard hotel in Kaysersberg, France. At the time he had been traveling with friend Éric Ripert. Ripert reported that he became worried when Bourdain missed dinner and breakfast. According to the public prosecutor Christian de Rocquigny du Fayel, Bourdain’s body showed no signs of violence. At this point there has been no official word on toxicology tests to determine whether drugs or medications were involved in his tragic death.
Legacy
It is hard to put into words the life and legacy of a man as dynamic as Anthony Bourdain. He wasn’t just a face on TV, he was a voice trying to tell us to embrace more of the delicious variety in life. It is easier to just look at some of his many accomplishments. Bourdain wrote multiple bestselling nonfiction books over the years, including:
- Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly
- Medium Raw: A Bloody Valentine to the World of Food and the People Who Cook
- A Cook’s Tour: In Search of the Perfect Meal
- The Nasty Bits
His articles and essays appeared in many publications, including:
- The New Yorker
- The New York Times
- The Times
- Los Angeles Times
- The Observer
- Gourmet
- Maxim
- Esquire
He even co-wrote an original graphic novel titled Get Jiro! For DC Comics/Vertigo.
Between 2002-2018 he hosted a number of shows, including:
- A Cook’s Tour
- No Reservations
- The Layover
- Parts Unknown
He worked on various other television shows, doing everything from judging to producing.
With the sudden news of Bourdain’s death, people from all across the world have paid homage to the man who did so much to try and share the beauty of diversity with us all. In the days following Bourdain’s death fans paid tribute to him outside his now-closed former place of employment, Brasserie Les Halles on New York City’s Park Avenue.
Fellow celebrity chefs and other public figures expressed sentiments of condolence, including Gordon Ramsay and Andrew Zimmern.
Beyond his amazing adventures of cooking in different countries, Bourdain also believed in making a difference for those less fortunate. He championed industrious immigrants from places like Mexico, Ecuador, and other countries in Central and South America.
He became a big advocate in the fight against sexual harassment in the restaurant industry in 2017, calling out other celebrity chefs and people in Hollywood.
Depression and Suicide
Anthony Bourdain had also been open about his struggles with depression. In 2016 he did an episode of Parts Unknown where he traveled to Argentina for psychotherapy. At one point he tells the camera,
“I will find myself in an airport, for instance, and I’ll order an airport hamburger. It’s an insignificant thing, it’s a small thing, it’s a hamburger, but it’s not a good one. Suddenly I look at the hamburger and I find myself in a spiral of depression that can last for days.”
While the passion he had for his work is quite obvious, traveling around 250 days of the year can take a toll. More than once he described his life as lonely. During an interview with People magazine, he said he was living the dream, but admitted that it did come at a cost. That cost may have had something to do with the ups and downs of marriage and divorce he experienced over the years.
Only a few months ago, when discussing his 11-year-old daughter Ariane, Bourdain had said he felt he had to “at least try to live” for her. Although he explained he also felt he did have things to live for. Sadly, it seems that over time, the iconic chef started losing his battle with the feelings he wrestled with on the road.
Anthony Bourdain’s death is another tragic loss in a trend we have seen a spike over the years, including among celebrities. Only three days before Bourdain’s own death, fashion designer Kate Spade took her own life. Suicide is a growing problem in the United States. According to a survey published by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:
- Suicide rates increased by 25% across the country over nearly two decades ending in 2016.
- 25 states have experienced a rise in suicides by more than 30%
While Anthony Bourdain may have been clean for decades, there was still pain there. While overcoming drugs may have been a huge victory in his inspiring legacy, other fights can still wear us down.
There is Help
As we remember the incredible impact that Anthony Bourdain had as an adventurer and advocate, we emphasize the importance of supporting those who need it the most. Sadly, we don’t always know when people need help. But we should always work to make sure people know that there is help, no matter what they are struggling with.
“As you move through this life and this world you change things slightly, you leave marks behind, however small. And in return, life — and travel — leaves marks on you. Most of the time, those marks — on your body or on your heart — are beautiful. Often, though, they hurt.”
–Anthony Bourdain
June 25, 1956 – June 8, 2018
Mental health is an important part of recovery for people who struggle with drugs or alcohol. Fighting depression and suicide prevention means supporting well-being and fighting for mental health support. For those struggling, treatment for mental health disorders and addiction is not always the easiest thing to seek out, but as we as a nation continue to evolve the conversation and raise awareness more people are finding out about the amazing pathways to a life in recovery that are out there. We urge you to seek yours. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse, please call toll-free now. You are not alone.
CALL NOW 1-888-922-5398
by staff | Aug 8, 2017 | Death, Fentanyl, Heroin, Naloxone, Narcan, Opioids
If you believe you or someone else is experiencing fentanyl overdose symptoms, please call 911 right away. Fentanyl is an extremely potent potentially fatal drug and should not be underestimated.
Fentanyl, also known as fentanil, is an incredibly potent synthetic opioid pain medication with a rapid onset and short duration of action. This drug is considered to be around 50 to 100 times more potent than morphine, while some fentanyl analogues such as carfentali, which are designed to mimic the pharmacological effects of the original drug, may be as much as 10,000 times more potent than morphine. Fentanyl brand names include:
- Actiq
- Duragesic
- Fentora
- Sublimaze
Individuals who abuse opioids, particularly heroin, are more likely to ingest fentanyl, knowingly or unintentionally. This puts them at an even higher risk of overdose.
In 2015 alone, 33,091 people died due to overdose on opioids like fentanyl.
Learning how to recognize the indications of a fentanyl overdose and getting professional substance abuse treatment may save a life.
Fentanyl Overdose Symptoms: Side Effects of Fentanyl
As an extremely potent opioid drug, fentanyl is very carefully prescribed and dosed by medical professionals. Those who abuse fentanyl may use the drug outside of prescription guidelines or without a prescription altogether, which can drastically increase their risk of lethal overdose.
Fentanyl’s most common side effects of Fentanyl use include
- Asthenia(weakness)
- Diarrhea
- Nausea
- Constipation
- Dry mouth
- Somnolence
- Confusion
- Sweating
Some of the less common side effects of Fentanyl use include:
- Abdominal pain
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Anorexia and weight loss
- Headache
- Fatigue
- Dizziness
- Nervousness
- Hallucinations
- Flu-like symptoms
- Dyspepsia(indigestion)
- Dyspnea (shortness of breath)
- Hypoventilation
- Urinary retention abuse
Fentanyl Overdose Symptoms: Risks of abuse
With a powerful drug like fentanyl the risk of abuse is exceedingly high, especially considering the drug’s medical use is so limited to treating extreme cases. So when people take fentanyl in higher doses or more frequently than prescribed it of course elevates their risk for serious side effects and experiencing fentanyl overdose symptoms.
As far as recreational use, fentanyl is extremely dangerous. Using this drug in any way other than intended, such as snorting or injecting it, is not only illicit abuse of the chemical, but potentially life-threatening. In recent years drug dealers have been mixing fentanyl powder with heroin to increase potency or compensate for low-quality heroin. This illegally manufactured, non-pharmaceutical fentanyl cut into other substances caused an outbreak of overdose deaths in the United States and Canada over the past several years.
Combining fentanyl with other drugs can have effects that either compound the already severe side effects of fentanyl or contradict the effect and cause more chaos in the body. Using fentanyl with other substances is very hazardous, especially with drugs such as:
- Alcohol
- Stimulants
- Benzodiazepines
- Antidepressant medication
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) conducted a study recently that showed:
- 82% of fentanyl overdose deaths involved illegally manufactured fentanyl
- Only 4% were suspected to originate from a prescription
National Forensic Laboratory Information System reported:
- 942 fentanyl seizures in 2013
- 3,344 fentanyl seizures in 2014
Fentanyl Overdose Symptoms: Signs to Look For
Being able to address a possible overdose means being able to recognize and understand some of the possible fentanyl overdose symptoms. While one of these may not be a definite indication, noticing a combination of symptoms may be a more serious issue.
A person experiencing fentanyl overdose symptoms may present with the following overdose signs:
- Pinpoint pupils
- Pale skin
- Nausea
- Choking sounds or gurgling/snoring noises
- Weak muscles
- Dizziness
- Confusion
- Extreme sleepiness
- Very low blood pressure
- Dangerously slowed or stopped breathing
- Blue skin tinge nails and lips
- Loss of consciousness
- Intensely slowed heart beat
- Coma
- Seizure
- Death
The effects of fentanyl overdose symptoms on an individual’s respiratory system and heart rate are the most serious relating to risk of death or permanent damage. Not only can this lead to coma or death, but even after surviving the overdose there can still be complications.
If not treated immediately, the impact of fentanyl overdose symptoms on the heart and respiratory system may cause residual problems such as permanent brain damage.
Fentanyl Overdose Symptoms: How Much Is Too Much?
It is difficult to determine the exact dose it would take for someone to experience fentanyl overdose symptoms. According to some medical professionals, 250 micograms of fentanyl might represent a lethal dose of fentanyl. However, most individual’s using heroin and other drugs are unaware that they have ingested the drug at all, let alone know how much fentanyl is in the doses.
At the end of the day, fentanyl overdose symptoms can vary depending on the individual, and the amount it takes to overdose will vary to. Some elements that impact the odds of overdosing includes:
- Other drugs taken
- Height
- Weight
- Age
- Physical condition
In the event of an overdose of fentanyl you should seek immediate emergency medical assistance. Some cases require several doses of Narcan (Naloxone), the opioid overdose antidote, to stabilize the individual suffering from an overdose. Even if you have access to Narcan or Naloxone yourself, always contact emergency medical services to get assistance, because when the antidote wears off the overdose could return, or there may be other severe complications.
Opiate medications and street drugs have done a great deal of damage these past few years. Synthetic opioids like fentanyl have raised the risks and increased the death rates in a big way. Far too many lives are ruined, or brought to an abrupt end, because of overdoses when there is real help out there. Don’t wait until after an overdose. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free now.
CALL NOW 1-888-922-5398
by Justin Mckibben | Jul 21, 2017 | Addiction, Addiction Stigma, Celebrity, Chester Bennington, Death, Drug Abuse, Mental Health, Mental Health Stigma, Suicide
(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)
I remember in junior high school when the guys and I pressured my friends mom to drive through a snow storm to the concert. After bugging a couple buddies to pitch in and buy me and my friend Chris tickets to see Linkin Park live in Columbus, Ohio for their 2003 tour with Hoobastank, Story of the Year and POD. While some of my crew preferred these bands I had history with Linkin Park albums:
- Hybrid Theory
- Reanimation
- Meteora
I mean come on; Meteora was one of the highest selling alternative music albums of all time! Hybrid Theory went multi-Platinum in several countries! You don’t have to love Linkin Park to acknowledge the impact this band had on music.
We were only 13 or 14 years old, and it was a massive crowd, probably full of lost kids just like us. Linkin Park is that sometimes melodic, sometimes growling scream that spoke to something in so many people. At 11 and 12 years old, when their fame was just beginning, their songs put words to things I didn’t know how to say. It was gloom and rage that inspired millions of people.
Granted in years since, I have grown away from their changes in sound and style. But I remember having the LP patches and stickers all over my stuff, next to my Tupac and Lynyrd Skynyrd.
I remember wanting to dye my hair and spike it out… because punk rock! And to freak out my mom.
And I remember listening to Reanimation on repeat trying to learn all the new words to remixes of my old favorites.
I remember when they did a remix album Collison Course with Jay Z.
And I remember stomping around the street in my small Midwestern neighborhood, late night in the pouring rain, banging my head to “One Step Closer” feeling like the most misunderstood kid ever.
So when the news broke today that the lead singer of Linkin Park, Chester Bennington had died it was so surreal. But when you look back at the artists music and his life, we have always been given a window into his pain, through a fierce puncturing scream and emotional lyrics.
Early Reports
Initial reports from TMZ were later reiterated by various sources of Bennington’s passing. Brian Elias, the chief of operations for the Los Angeles County coroner’s office, confirmed the death reports. At the tragically young age of 41, Chester Bennington leaves behind 6 children from two relationships. Not to mention a loyal family of musicians and millions of fans all over the world.
According to Elias the singer’s death is currently being investigated as a possible suicide. Chester Bennington was close friends with the other legendary rock vocalist Chris Cornell, who recently committed suicide in May. On what would have been Cornell’s 53rd birthday, Bennington appears to have taken his own life.
Social media sites like Facebook and Twitter were lit up in a matter of hours with thousands and thousands of fans sending their love and support to Bennington’s family and the band. Celebrities from Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson to director Joss Whedon, rockers like Corey Taylor of Slipknot and graphic artists like BossLogic, to Chance the Rapper, Killer Mike and Cypress Hill took to the internet to pay homage and talk about how Linkin Park’s music helped them through tough times.
Chester Bennington: Pain and Addiction
With songs that were full of dark and deeply personal themes and words, it is not hard to imagine that Chester Bennington faced his demons. But Bennington himself has been open about his fight with drug and alcohol addiction throughout his life, and his battles with the abuse he faced in his childhood.
Skimming through multiple sites and past interviews, you find that in life Chester Bennington had seen his fair share of darkness. In an interview years back he opened up about being molested and beaten by an older male friend beginning at age seven. At 11 years old, his parents divorced and he was forced to live with his father. After discovering drugs, he used:
At one point saying in an interview in 2016 he was taking 11 hits of acid a day:
“I dropped so much acid I’m surprised I can still speak. I’d smoke a bunch of crack, do a bit of meth and just sit there and freak out. Then I’d smoke opium to come down. I weighed 110 pounds.”
Benning was able to avoid heavy drug use for a while, but after becoming hugely successful, drugs found their way back into his life. For a few years after getting clean in 2006, Bennington went on to openly discussed how his fight with addiction and his recovery fed into the roaring rage and agony in his music. In an interview in 2009 with Noisecreep, Bennington stated:
“I have been able to tap into all the negative things that can happen to me throughout my life by numbing myself to the pain so to speak and kind of being able to vent it through my music,”
“I don’t have a problem with people knowing that I had a drinking problem. That’s who I am and I’m kind of lucky in a lot of ways cause I get to do something about it.”
One of the most well-known songs Linkin Park ever released was the haunting and heartbroken song “Crawling” from their debut album Hybrid Theory. The video was pretty cool visually for its time, and the song itself is pretty much the pinnacle of emotional screaming “nu rock” of the early 2000s. Linkin Park later won the Grammy for best hard rock performance in 2001 for “Crawling”.
You want to see something intense, watch the clips of Chris Cornell and Chester Bennington sing “Crawling” live on stage in 2008.
Later on Bennington was quoted as saying this song particularly was,
“- about feeling like I had no control over myself in terms of drugs and alcohol.”
He went on to explain the feeling of being able to write the words, sing that feeling into his music and win a Grammy after selling millions of records. In another interview, when discussing his back and forth battle with addiction and relapse Chester Bennington talked about the song “Breaking the Habbit” and how upon reading the lyrics, he broke into tears because he felt that at the time his band mate and fellow vocalist Mike Shinoda was writing about his life.
In His Own Words
In an interview that recently became on viral video in light of the tragic death of Chester Bennington, the singer himself made a profound statement about struggling with life on life’s terms, depression and the desire to give up, saying:
“None of us are immune from just shit happening to you, and not to you but just making poor choices or being human. There’s always that element and for me life got really weird and really hard all at one time.
There was a few times over the last couple years where I was just ready to throw in the towel and just give up on everything, but I found that, for me most of my suffering is self-inflicted.”
He later continues stating:
“I’ve always had this depressive side, and I think that’s something some people may not have gone down the road of injecting and living on the streets and that kind of stuff, so they think ‘Oh my story’s not that bad’. Dude, no man, if you’re here, if you’re here, it’s that bad.”
His words have always been good for striking a nerve. Now especially these words are easy to relate to, and easy to see how Bennington was desperate for something… what, we may never really know.
In death, Bennington has shown us that we don’t always know what people are going through. Back in 2016 he had told an interviewer from Metal Hammer,
“The idea that success equals happiness pisses me off. It’s funny to think that just because you’re successful you’re now immune to the full range of the human experience.”
It has become another tragic and heartbreaking example of how success in the professional or monetary sense does not make someone happy. That recovery and sobriety can be a battle, and no amount of money or prestige can make someone content with their own mind.
In life, Chester Bennington used his music to teach us about experiencing our pain as a beautiful thing, and to find ways to express it. His music showed a lot of young people they were not alone, and that being hurt did not mean they had to be afraid. And even if you were afraid, he admitted that fear is how we fall. He spoke openly in interviews countless times over the years about the traumas he personally had to face, and about the devastation he had put himself through in that process. Chester Bennington taught us we didn’t have to be perfect to be transparent, and for some of us gave us a reason to relish in the fury of youth.
Bennington talked about finding something worth fighting for, whether it was freedom and human rights, or identity and creativity. By uniting so many people from all over the globe in common emotional intensity, it is music like that of Linkin Park that also removes some of the stigma surrounding depression, addiction and trauma. And this news has inspired a greater call to action for anyone struggling with substance use disorder, depression or abuse to reach out and find help any way they can.
From one kid who knows depression, anxiety and alcoholism… and who discovered unique forms of self-expression through your music and the various projects you were involved with visually and otherwise, thank you for all you gave us.
“In the memory you’ll find me
Eyes burning up
The darkness holding me tightly
Until the sun rises up”
In memory of
Chester Bennington
March 20, 1976 – July 20, 2017
If you or someone you love is struggling, please do not wait. Please call toll-free now. We want to help. You are not alone.
CALL NOW 1-888-922-5398
